Admitting the truth to yourself

Gepubliceerd door Oliane op 1 mei 2017

I was diagnosed with PTSD, major depression and anxiety disorder in2011. I subsequently had a cancerous kidney removed and have stage 3 kidney disease in the remainig kidney. I also have stage 3 COPD. I am a member of Final Exit Network. I struggle every second of every minute of every hour of every day just to exist because I am forced to do so. The only thing i look forward to are doctor appointments hoping I will be told that my physical conditions have worsened and I can refuse treatment and hopefully have an end to an existence that I resent. How can I get additonal information residency requirements, medical and phsychological requirements to end myl life in Belgium or anywhere else for that matter? Hopefully you can provide information and resources not  available in the USA
Thank you,

Dear R.,                               

You ask me if I can provide information and resources to end your life? I can’t help you with that question. Your meaningful words show me that your body demands from you that you listen to it. Why don’t you listen to your body what it tells you? Your letter shows that you do not living with the truth. The truth of the little girl you once were. It sounds if you denied the facts like many others, as well as doctors and psychiatrists, that every illness is strongly linked to physical and emotional mistreatment and neglect in their childhood. I think that you need an enlightened witness, a well-informed person who can listen to you to the victim you once were as a child with indignation and without being scared by her story. What happens if we suppress our rage from the tortures child we once were? Rage like all other emotions cannot be controlled and cannot be manipulated with surgery and medication. I hope that such a person can help you to love the small, abused girl that has been waiting for such a long time. I wish you the courage to do so. Do you know the books and website of Alice Miller? They can be your guide as they were for me to face and feel the truth about my own history.

Warmly, Oliane                                                                    



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